The dentist's beard

[vaneramos]

bitterlawngnome once asked me when I knew I was attracted to men with beards. It was a difficult question to answer. I have always liked facial hair, but djjo is actually the first guy who identified as a bear who I have had a relationship with. Until recently I simply didn't have the opportunity for much social contact with other bears.

But an innocuous comment by art_thirst triggered a childhood memory that provides a clue.

My baby teeth were unhealthy, so I spent many hours in the dentist's chair under Dr. Mazac's drill. Isn't Mazac a perfect name for a dentist?

Actually I liked going to the dentist. I even liked having my teeth drilled and filled. Dr. Mazac gave me nitrous oxide. I remember him telling me to imagine I was flying in an airplane, and that's exactly how it felt. All my worries and pain went away. The world felt hazy, gentle and warm.

I must have been about five. One day I was lying there with him drilling away. Slowly I started to raise my hand, with my forefinger doing a slow, drilling motion. I reached toward Dr. Mazac's face, and bored into his thick, curly beard. Dr. Mazac giggled, but he couldn't proceed. He had to call my mother to come in and sit there, holding my hand down so he could get on with his work.

He was a stocky, handsome fellow. And now I suppose that is where my early experiences of pleasure began: lying back, on nitrous oxide, with the dentist's salt-and-pepper beard and kind face moving to and fro in front of my eyes.