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Reconnection time
Sep. 13th, 2003 10:21 amThe Waterloo-Wellington Rainbow Chorus held its first fundraising dance of the new season last night. We have already had two rehearsals this month, but this was our first social event of the fall. Other than at Brenda and Judy's wedding, I missed seeing many of these friends over the summer.
The social texture of my life has changed drastically, and so has the way I feel about myself. Up until two years ago I had no close, abiding friendships in this city. For five years I had been incredibly lonely following ostracism by my old church. But it was partly by choice: isolation as a direct result of clinical depression.
One of the most hopeful indicators of prevailing wellness these recent years has been the growing strength of my friendships. I have chosen to be a friend. I stopped sitting passively at home, waiting for people to reach out to me. I invested myself. When someone I cared about seemed busy or preoccupied, I took the initiative to stay in touch. When I ran into personal conflicts with a couple choir members last season, I didn't quit like in the past, I stuck it out.
Yesterday afternoon Sylvie dropped by unannounced. No one ever used to do that. She had come out to this corner of town to buy some fabric from Len's Mill Store. She showed me her purchases and told me about the quilt she is going to make.
I showed her some of my recent photography. When it was time for her to go, I walked her back through the park partway toward downtown. We haven't had a chance to hang out alone together since the spring because I have been busy with the kids and she has a girlfriend now. But it was a happy visit. More than anyone else, with Sylvie I have no secrets, no holding back.
( more, some sexual content )
The social texture of my life has changed drastically, and so has the way I feel about myself. Up until two years ago I had no close, abiding friendships in this city. For five years I had been incredibly lonely following ostracism by my old church. But it was partly by choice: isolation as a direct result of clinical depression.
One of the most hopeful indicators of prevailing wellness these recent years has been the growing strength of my friendships. I have chosen to be a friend. I stopped sitting passively at home, waiting for people to reach out to me. I invested myself. When someone I cared about seemed busy or preoccupied, I took the initiative to stay in touch. When I ran into personal conflicts with a couple choir members last season, I didn't quit like in the past, I stuck it out.
Yesterday afternoon Sylvie dropped by unannounced. No one ever used to do that. She had come out to this corner of town to buy some fabric from Len's Mill Store. She showed me her purchases and told me about the quilt she is going to make.
I showed her some of my recent photography. When it was time for her to go, I walked her back through the park partway toward downtown. We haven't had a chance to hang out alone together since the spring because I have been busy with the kids and she has a girlfriend now. But it was a happy visit. More than anyone else, with Sylvie I have no secrets, no holding back.
( more, some sexual content )
