Working myself up

Earlier this month I started volunteering at Out On The Shelf, Guelph's queer lending library, which has been open about a year. I like all the other volunteers I've met so far. They're all new people to me. I'm pleased to be making more acquaintances in the community. And of course they're all book people, too. We do four-hour shifts, welcoming people, signing out and shelving books, and so on. The library occupies a board room donated part-time from the Canadian Mental Health Association. During evening hours one volunteer must sit inside the front doors to let our clients in, because the building is locked. We take half-hour shifts. I like that, too. It gives me a chance to read. I plan to familiarize myself with all the library's resources, but for now I'm poring through Heaven's Gate. enjoy going there so much that I've picked up extra shifts from other volunteers who need someone to fill in.

I started volunteering in order to nose my way toward a real job. Since November I've treated work at Two Rivers Neighbourhood Group as real employment. Now I have two part-time jobs, a few hours a week. This week was the busiest yet, partly because I've been working on the September newsletter for Two Rivers. Tuesday I worked at the office two hours, then did an evening shift at OOTS, four hours. I worked on the newsletter for four more hours on Wednesday, and two on Thursday, completing as much as possible because I'm taking next week off to go camping with the girls. Today wasn't volunteer work, strictly speaking, but I helped a co-worker from Two Rivers move, with the help of two other adults and six children. I was the brawn. We worked from 10 until 6. I didn't mind being the brawn. I had told her ahead of time I wouldn't move heavy appliances, and that was fine. Tomorrow morning I'll do another three-hour shift at OOTS. Sunday is Two Rivers' community picnic, and I'll work from 10 until 3:30 or so, setting up, cooking hotdogs, and taking down.

Altogether I will have worked 28 hours this week. I'm liking it. I don't feel overwhelmed or tired as I did last winter. Okay, today I feel tired from moving all that furniture, but it's a satisfied feeling. I helped someone in need or, in another sense, gave something to the community.

I'm having a hard time getting my own stuff done. The housework is out of hand. Sometime tomorrow I have to do laundry and get organized for the camping trip. I'll have time in September to work on adjusting the routine.

28 hours might not seem like much, but this is the steadiest I've worked since depression knocked me out in May 1995. I'm building experience, references and confidence, in particular a sense of what I can contribute. It feels good. Next space on the game board is paid employment, which raises a host of attendant challenges. But I'm as ready as ever.