trapezebear

[vaneramos]

Now I have met 20 people on my friends list, but none of them were nearly as close as Pete trapezebear before we met. I'm terrible at maintaining email correspondence, but Pete and I got past that. Judging by the heap of messages we have exchanged over the past 12 months, he was perhaps the closest cyber-friend I have had.

Now we are friends in the flesh.

I was nervous about meeting Pete. What if we didn't get along in person? Most people convey themselves somewhat differently in their journals from how they seem in person, intentionally or not. Pete and I were both self-aware and expressive of these differences, but how would they affect our interaction face-to-face? Despite his claim to be less outgoing in person, I couldn't imagine him as anything other than the outspoken activist who likes to rant about social issues, but often comes across as witty, emotional and charming. Reserved as I am, awkward about conversation and tentative in my opinions about politics and popular culture, I felt apprehensive.

Besides, our friendly flirtation had set up an erotic charge that mildly intimidated me. With respect to sex, I'm more at ease in fantasy than reality. I love to see, show off, and wildly imagine, but often feel defencive when faced with a physical exchange of power.

My anxieties were unfounded. His energy felt comfortable from the moment we met. To my delight, he also clicked well with Danny djjo. We spent a pleasant Saturday evening with friends in Toronto, which has been described pretty well by bigmacbear over here. Altogether, I hung out with at least 12 LJers that night, a record for me.

The rest of my visit with Pete was considerably quieter. We came to Guelph on Sunday afternoon to catch the tail end of the Pride Picnic. Then we went to see Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Soul (on dakoopst's recommendation: thank you, Stephen, it was excellent) at the early show. Home at last I made us a late dinner of ginger scallops and shrimp with linguine. Yesterday was rainy, but we didn't mind: we spent most of the day cuddling, snoozing and watching part of the BBC's The Chronicles of Narnia. Pete took me out for a late dinner at The Bookshelf Café (a nice treat; it's one of my favourite restaurants but has become too pricey, so I hadn't eaten there in a couple of years).

He also gave me a copy of The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman, a piece of philosophical fantasy which I have already begun to consume ravenously.

This morning the sun rose ingratiatingly, summoning us outdoors so I could share the Eramosa's enchantments with Pete. In fact the river called me in a particular way: while attempting to shoot these photos of him, I fell in and got soaked to the waist. We saw Lilac Way, but the blooms are past their peak.

As Pete suggested this morning, these visits can be an emotional rollercoaster. I don't know when we'll get together again, only that we will.