Anxiety group, week 2

[vaneramos]

Safe: on Kingsmill Avenue, Sunday afternoon


I had my second anxiety group meeting today. I like it so far. One woman rides the same bus from downtown, and she greeted me when I boarded today.

Last week in the course of the meeting I had one of the worst panic attacks of my life. Even chest pains. I don't understand why. All I can guess is, I had sympathy panic for the eight other anxious participants, one woman so terrified she never looked up from her lap.

A panic attack is the fight-or-flight response. In panic disorder they occur for no reason, occasionally even waking me from a dead sleep. They cannot be controlled. Therapy can reduce their frequency and severity.

Strange to say, I'm not afraid of panic attacks. I've had them since my teens, didn't know what they were, only knew I had to hide them to avoid being a sissy. I'm very good at hiding them. In the midst of it last week, I was able to talk about it matter-of-factly. Meanwhile feeling like I was ready to die. For 12 minutes one becomes utterly distracted.

I didn't panic today.

On the bus home I saw a woman who looked like Audrey Hepburn.