How lovely are thy Australian branches

[vaneramos]

For several weeks I have been trying to decide whether to buy a real (traditional and cheap) or artificial (clean and convenient) Christmas tree. Today in the car the phrase "Norfolk Island pine" slipped across my tongue, so unforeseen that it must have been Freudian. This morning androkles expressed concern over the way Christmas has spawned a global domination of pine trees, so my idea came as a slight gesture towards him. Norfolk Island pines are not pines at all, more like a giant clubmoss imported from Australia. They make nice houseplants. Marian applauded the idea, so we decided to stop at our favourite greenhouse instead of the Christmas tree farm. For a price midway between a real and artificial tree, I have a permanent, live addition to my indoor jungle.



Marian was too interested in decorating herself and her clothes—with duct tape, it's an adolescent thing—to help much with the tree, but Brenna gave expert assistance. While I strung a single strand of gold lights around it, she started unpacking decorations. Unfortunately the whole box, which has sat in the basement since last year, reeked of mouse piss. By the time I had finished the lights, Bren had unwrapped a few ornaments.

"Why don't we decorate it all in gold?" she suggested.

I think my taste has influenced her too much. Gone is the little girl who wanted as much gaudy colour as possible. Marian vetoed the all-one-colour idea, and I negotiated for some variation. We turned out a mostly gold and purple number with traces of blue, white and crystal. To finish things off, Brenna tastefully strung a row of glittery wicker snowflakes around the edge of the basket. It is awfully lovely, way too Martha Stewart for anyone's health.

Most of my decorations are survivors from my marriage and first two or three years out of the closet when I hadn't yet found my direction in life. I'm so glad I turned into a jeans and t-shirt fag instead of an exquisite decorator queen. Still, it would be wise for me to start investing in some Christmas tree kitsch for next year, otherwise my beard and chest hair are bound to start falling out and my daughters' minds will be permanently damaged.

I'm sure Martha wouldn't approve of the mouse piss, so I stowed the box of unused decorations back in the basement and we all washed our hands.

Comments

[bitterlawngnome.livejournal.com]

It totally depends ... were the mice pedigreed?

[rsc.livejournal.com]

I'm sure your title was supposed to give people O Tannenbaum earworms, but the first thing that starting sounding in my warped brain was the 4th movement of the Brahms Requiem.

As for that tree -- don't let it escape. I believe they're pest trees in this hemisphere.

It looks neat, by the way.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

4th movement

Now you've done it. That is one of my favourite movements of music.

[quirkstreet.livejournal.com]

It's very pretty. I love the decorations and the descriptions of you and the girls collaborating/negotiating on colors and styles. I also love the phrase "jeans and t-shirt fag."

I have to ask--weren't you reading Connie Willis's Bellwether a while back? Because Marian's wanting to decorate herself with duct tape is SO something out of that novel!!

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Oh, Pete, it's so funny. I got out duct tape to cover the extension cord and prevent tripping. The instant I set it down, Marian got hold of it and started applying strips to her clothes and skin and wrapping a big loop around her waist. I instantly thought of Flip. I'll have to tell Danny about this (he is out of email contact for a few days).

It's especially funny because on the way down in the car this afternoon we had an awesome conversation in which she told me she was fed up with most of the kids in her school because they all follow the crowd. She said she has the shortest hair of any girl in the school, and most of the kids don't like her because she's a punk (she's going to a Baptist private school).

"I really don't care what people think of me," she said.

I sure wish I had been able to say that when I was 12. I also wish I could have talked that way to my dad. I was glad to hear her say, though, that a couple of kids in her class are okay. Her best friend goes to a different school.

I can see her spirit developing. She is a great kid. Right now she is slouching around the living room, digging into a fantasy novel off my shelf by Canadian author Guy Gavriel Kay.

[quirkstreet.livejournal.com]

Marian sounds wonderful. As the members of Spinal Tap said, sometimes it's a fine line between clever and stupid :-), and I hesitated to compare Marian to Flip in a bad way. That independent spirit will be really interesting to watch develop. I did get the biggest laugh out of the thought of her decorating with duct tape, though. Adding in her short hair and punkish tendencies makes it all the more delightful. I expect Danny will be MOST tickled!

Guy Gavriel Kay is a real favorite. I think I probably have all his books, except the recent poetry collection. "Tigana" was my most favorite at one point, although of course "The Fionavar Tapestry" series is arguably the best thing of its kind since Tolkien. I admire how he's developed the knack of writing historical fiction set in alternate realities without leaning too heavily on the fantastic elements ... in some books, there's hardly anything out of the ordinary. Though I love the fantastic elements when he chooses to use them.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

I'm pleased to hear you know about Kay. Marian started The Summer Tree this evening. I loved the Tapestry. It has nearly the richness of Tolkien's work, but with a more accessible human element. I read Tigana so long a go that I don't remember it very well, but I enjoyed it. I didn't like Sailing to Sarantium and its sequel as much. Normally I like interweaving plots, but in this case they divided endlessly and never resolved to my satisfaction. The historical aspects were delightful, though.

[quirkstreet.livejournal.com]

The Sarantine books were the first I've read by him where I felt disappointed by the resolutions or lack thereof. I enjoyed them overall, but they didn't catch me quite like some of the earlier ones. A new book is due early next Spring, this time set in a "Norse" arena ...!

[queenmomcat.livejournal.com]

Too bad; I could really use a really over the top decorator queen to doll up MY house for the holidays. We have zippo up. On the other hand, I'm all for short hair on women of any age. (for which see stephe's entry from last friday, if you haven't already)

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Personally I like long hair on women, but I have to admit Marian looks great with it short.

Not mulch

[martinsoba.livejournal.com]

I absolutely love your tree! I journaled about xmas trees last night also. You proved there really is no reason to chop one down. Yours will love you for years.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

These plants baffle me. They look just like giant versions of the "Christmas tree ferns"—really clubmosses—that grow behind my cottage.

Where did you get y'all from? I've hardly heard that since I was a kid and my family would visit Florida on the March Break from school.

[ubermunkey.livejournal.com]

I love the pic and the post.
I love the tree instead of tree cutting.
I love that conversation with your daughter about being different and not wanting to fit into the crowd, but still having friends.
I do gain much from your posts. Hope in fact.

Mouse piss or no, the tree with the ornaments looks nice.

I think you are onto something with getting decorations now for next year. Smart.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Thank you. We actually picked up a couple new decorations today and added them to the tree. They don't go with the other decorations at all. They're fun.

[theatresumthing.livejournal.com]

I must admit, as I sit here in my seat shorts and t-shirt, that we have contributed mightily to the pine tree conspiracy by putting up a 12 foot Frasier in the living room. We went for colored lights this year, and it is festooned with ornaments.

But my husband is German, and tanenbaum is oh so important to him.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

The tree was always one of my favourite parts of the season, too. Last year was the first year of my life I didn't have a Christmas tree, but I'm glad we have one this time. I think I might try getting some mixed lights for next year, though.