Things I like

Photo: Brenna's famous pumpkin, a few mornings after.

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Marian is on her midterm break, and last night was one of the worst panics of my life. For the first time I asked myself, "Am I a really bad parent?" I get mad when I misplace boots, umbrellas, keys. But 12-year-old daughters? Due to an ambiguous communication from a staffer at Marian's school and my failure to get the facts straight, I experienced confusion about where in Toronto the bus was supposed to drop her off. Marian ended up at York Mills Shopping Mall at the corner of Bayview. Thanks to a helpful policeman directing vehicles at the entrance, she learned that her father was indeed driving up and down York Mills between Yonge and Leslie, hammering the wheel and gasping frantically at sluggish rush hour traffic. So when I returned to Bayview, half an hour late, she was waiting patiently, shivering in a thin sweatshirt.

So it didn't turn out as badly as I was beginning to imagine. We're back at Bill and Danny's. And I'm ready to resume regular programming, today's free write inspired by recent memishness.

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I like the smell of frankincense and sandalwood, roses, lilacs and magnolias. I love the sight of a crowd of yellow daffodils, or of poplar leaves trembling in the wind. I like Winnie-the-Pooh and the Hundred Acre Wood, Alice in Wonderland, and The Wind in the Willows.

I like LeGuin, Tolkien, Davies, Findley. I like reading in bed until I get sleepy.

I love laughing with my daughters and taking them to the Royal Ontario Museum. I like Monet, Constable, Turner and the Group of Seven. I like quilts. I like the hat Danny knit for me.

My favourite composers are Sibelius, Dvorak, Rachmanninoff and Vaughan Williams. Also Brahms, Poulenc, Rimsky-Korsakov and Saint-Saens. I like Mahler and Bruckner, Copland and Barber. I like long slow, contemplative movements, and quick, capricious ones. Folk songs and tone poems. I love piano, clarinet, soprano saxophone, and cello best of all. I like Buffy Saint-Marie, Loreena McKennitt, Madonna and Annie Lennox. I like Middle-Eastern dance rhythms. I like energy music. I like to dance.

I love the smell of fallen maple leaves on an autumn day. I like the first warm day of spring when I can open the windows and let the breeze blow through. I like sunlight. I like lying in the grass. I like sliding my feet across soft sheets on a cold winter evening. I like wood fires in the hearth. I like warm, windy summer nights with a full moon and breakers crashing in the distance. I like the dark.

I like shellfish, mushrooms, summer fruit and all kinds of cheese. I like Thai food and good old meat and potatoes. I like my steak medium rare. I like taking my girls to Chinese food buffets. I like Strongbow cider, red wine, dessert wines, and Southern Comfort and 7-Up.

Almost more than anything, I like diving into Lake Fletcher, feeling the cool, silver water enfold me. I like snorkelling and finding big bass under the raft, staring back at me. I like exploring the woods and identifying wildflowers that are new to me. I like knowing the names of all the trees. I like identifying birds by their songs, and knowing the names of stars. I like growing vegetables, herbs and perennial flowers. I think irises are my favourite flower. I like my mom's garden, which is full of irises and daffodils.

I like receiving long slow blowjobs. I like being teased. I like being tied up and teased. I like to get fucked. I enjoy sex toys and poppers. I like sex in the woods, or in the lake at night.

Most of all I like affectionate men who would just as soon hold me. I like the way I get turned on when they hold me. I like back rubs, foot rubs and belly rubs. I like my nipples nibbled. I love sleeping next to Danny. I like men who are more interested in my heart and mind than in my looks.

I like tenderness, gentleness and courtesy. I like eyes that smile. I like people who speak the truth with consideration. I like to talk to people I trust. I like people who take responsibility for their actions, words and feelings. I like people who know how to disagree in a constructive manner. I like knowing that it's okay to be wrong and make mistakes sometimes, and people who aren't afraid to admit that they're wrong.

I like ecology and anthropology. I like organic gardening and permaculture. I like intentional communities. I like nature, and people who treat it with respect. I like religious tolerance. I am intrigued with mysticism. I like Rumi, Whitman and Dillard.

I like meeting Craig for coffee, and the way he knows me. I like playing Scrabble online with Clay. I like the special links I feel with Ziggy (weird, joined-at-the-brain before birthedness) and Connor (common experiences). I like playing Cribbage with Brenna and Danny. I like Sunday evening dinners at Bill and Danny's. I like poetry readings and visiting artists' studios.

I like sailing, hiking, camping and visiting new places.

I like when familiar words fit together in unfamiliar ways and lend new meanings. I like sharing wordplay with Marian, when one of us will say some nonsense words and we'll both crack up. I like how she confides in me. I like seeing Brenna make things with her hands, and I like her belly laugh. I like being a dad.

I like beaches, mountains and caves. I like travelling to British Columbia, Virginia, Algonquin Park, Montreal and PEI. I like Canada and being a Canadian.

I like moustaches, beards, strong arms, strong shoulders and shapely calves. I like hairy chests and legs. I'm glad I'm gay. I like showing love, affection and tenderness to others, besides my man.

I like blue, green and purple. I like crystals and colourful minerals glinting in the rock.

I like coffee with double cream, no sugar. I like chai tea, green tea, Earl grey tea and herbal tea. I have a sweet tooth. I like cinnamon, cloves, ginger, nutmeg and allspice. I like pesto and fresh basil, French tarragon and marjoram. I like chocolate, but I like vanilla better.

I like photography. I like drawing with Prismacolor pencils. I like NaNoWriMo. I like writing in my notebook, and writing in my LJ.