The Forgotten, and other good thrillers

Marian

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Last night Danny, Marian and I went to see The Forgotten. It stars Julianne Moore, who has become one of my favourite actors. She often plays a woman slightly or extremely off balance. In this case she was utterly sane, and the rest of the world was going mad, or rather being plunged into madness by unseen forces. At the beginning of the movie, her son has died 14 months previously, but as the story progresses, mementoes of his life begin vanishing, trying to persuade her that he never existed. In fact the people around her start telling her she imagined it all.

It hit some emotional buttons I've felt quite recently, like the question, "Am I a bad parent?" Moore's character is made out to be extraordinary, in that she persists in remembering Sam against all odds. This is a good movie for parents. Ask yourself the question, "Could I forget?" Seeing this movie with Marian along was an interesting experience. It gave us a chance to talk, ever so briefly, about the bond between parent and child.

Looking back, I realize now, I persisted in maintaining contact and being there for my daughters against very tough odds. You read and see stories about dads or moms who gave up or seemed to walk away from their responsibilities. Whenever you it, consider that you're only getting half the story. It is a terrible thing to wage a war of vindication over the lives of children, but it happens. I knew a woman whose ex-husband managed to get full custody of their two sons, and refused her access for several years. When they reached an age where they had more control over their own choices, they started coming back into her life. As young adults they chose to live with her for a while. My word to parents in those situations is: "Don't give up. Make sure your kids know that you love them unconditionally. Your commitment will likely stand the test of time, as it has for me."

The Forgotten did not offer a polemic message, and yet I came away with this thought: "I did not forget. Never forget!"

Earlier in the day I had taken Marian to see some graffiti art on an abandonned Canadian Tire building near Keele and Dundas (that's where I took this portrait). I lent her my camera to take some pictures. She was impressed: "Most parents wouldn't even let their kids go near a place like that," she said.

"Why?" I asked. Neither of us had a clear answer to that.

I told her that my contact with other artists (on LJ) has made me realize that "high art" can be intimidating for many people. Graffiti art is just as valuable in its own way. I want to encourage her own self-expression as best I can.

Speaking of remembering, The Forgotten triggered car crash flashbacks. There is an accident scene. If you see the movie, that is exactly how I experienced my accident on Jarvis Street in November 2000. It was my fault: confusion over traffic signals. No one was hurt, but I was afraid to ride, let alone drive, on Toronto streets for months afterward. I'm still afraid to drive on Jarvis, its green arrows threatening to confuse me if my concentration drops for an instant.

The Forgotten also reminded me of a couple other favourite movies I have never mentioned here because they don't receive much coverage in the usual lists. I love a good thriller, and one of the best I have seen in recent years was The Mothman Prophecies (2002), starring a bereaved Richard Gere, one of his most convincing roles (I usually can't stand him). Creepingly foreboding, and apparently based on a true story. I don't know what I make of that.

Another old favourite is The Eye of the Needle (1981) starring Canada's own Kate Nelligan at her most vulnerable and the inimitable Donald Sutherland at his most evil.

In the end, The Forgotten left me with this dissatisfied question: ( semi plot spoiler )

The other two great thrillers I mentioned here do not present that problem. They're classics, in my books.

Saturday special: Kensington Market

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