Torvald

[vaneramos]

Hearing Torvald's family and friends describe him at the memorial yesterday, I was struck by our commonalities. But our lives followed different trajectories. His twin brother described him as unlucky. Born in the same year, we both loved books, language and plants. We came from well-read, articulate and irreligious families. We were both doers.

But Torvald questioned authority while I poured my energy into the things my teachers considered useful. I denied expression of my sexuality throughout the 80s and early 90s, which may have saved my life. Meanwhile he was attending kiss-ins, lie-ins and Marxist conventions.

I thought I would have time to get to know Torvald better. His illness and our depression interfered.

Here is my most vivid memory. It was a Tuesday, underwear night at the Black Eagle, more than a year ago. It was late and the bar was almost empty. I stood watching Torvald play pool. We had met once before. I was wearing white briefs, and men had bought me a couple drinks. I was relaxed and flirtatious.

Torvald was fully dressed. After his friend left, he embraced and gave me a long, passionate kiss, the kind that knocks you off your feet and you never forget.

Goodnight.

Comments

[khema.livejournal.com]

It's amazing how some of the things we resent or do unconsciously at the time turn out to be the very thing that leads us to where we (happily) are later.

It's been a while since I've been on. Thought I'd pop in and say Hi. :) I've moved to Kitchener (last year, in fact), and I just got a puppy!

There. You're caught up.

(Not even close! :)

I'm looking forward to reading more.

K

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

I've been incredibly busy this week with no time to read, but it's nice to hear from you.