Variations

[vaneramos]

It comes as such a relief to write morning pages today. Natalie Goldberg said her spiritual mentor Katagiri Roshi suggested writing was, for Natalie, her spiritual practice. The same for me, I think. Often the words come out nonsense, scrambled; all I can do is let them flow like world madness, finding reassurance in the familiarity of process. This morning the words themselves line up, peace and order, iron filings portraying my inner magnetosphere. This is the essence of meditation, isn't it? Accepting whatever your insides give you, letting it be, learning to observe, and finding rest.

Drawing does the same, another language for what's inside. This morning I have time for that, too, before the girls stir from their beds. And surprise, surprise! I finish a fourth drawing in time to send to Denver. This one got started last week during art class, carrying familiar themes in a new direction, so I call it Variations. It contains ideas about creativity and evolution, art mimicking life.

In two hours I achieve the grounding I've desperately wanted for days. It is good. I resist the temptation to berate myself about the period of neglect. Without searching and struggling, there can be no arrival. And arrival is merely a footing toward what will come.

Comments

[vaysha.livejournal.com]

the drawing is beautiful.

I have a journal I call deep breakfast for my morning pages- I feel they are so helpful for clearing the head out.

enjoy your day Van

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Thank you, my dear. "Deep breakfast" is great! It seems to work best if I make time for writing before eating, although a cup of decaf usually accompanies it.

[ink-ling.livejournal.com]

Question: I am thinking of easing back into writing ... again, but I don't really have a space that leads me to write. Where do you write and/or draw?

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Having a nice place to work makes a lot of difference for me. My most cherished possession is a 1920s oak library table passed down in my family. I love sunlight, so the desk faces a southeast window where I can greet the morning. This works especially well in winter. Keeping the desk clear requires constant vigilance, but if I neglect it, writing suffers. It has a nice broad surface, which also serves well for drawing. One of the reasons I like working with Prismacolor pencils is they're easy to clean up and put away, so my work space can do double duty. The only problem is my office doesn't have adequate electric light, so I can't work at my desk in the evening, my best creative time. I need a new desk lamp.

Despite reliance on the desk, I find it worthwhile to cultivate an ability to write anywhere and anytime. Whenever possible, I write morning pages on the bus, on the dock, at Danny and Bill's kitchen table, at a coffee shop, or on a picnic table at the park. Where I write affects how I write, and this variation is fertile.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Wow thanks. Coming from you that means a lot to me.