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[personal profile] vaneramos

Last night in the car I got to know Richard Strauss's Four Last Songs. My mind was racing and I wanted to distract myself, so I put in a CD of Renée Fleming's performance. The songs were not familiar, but I enjoy Strauss's music and knew the settings possessed a transcendant quality, which I needed.

The first time through the cycle, my mind raced in other directions and I heard almost nothing. The third song has a lovely climbing melodic phrase, which I recognized, so I went back and replayed it. The second and third time, I was still distracted. I've been working on concentration, so I continued to replay it until it sunk in.

The first two verses are restless, almost aimless. You can't pin down a melody. Then the singer stops and the solo violin begins. "How strange," I thought, "to interrupt the song like that." The violin finally presents the rhapsodic melody I remembered. Then the soprano returns and repeats its upward yearning, and the music finally diffuses into utter peace.

Stopping at a traffic light in Toronto, I pulled out the liner notes and glanced at the song. It's title is "Beim Schlafengehen", or "Going to sleep". The first two verses are indeed troubled. The violin's interruption is a lullaby. Afterward it is as if the singer has gone to sleep, entering a dream world.

Now that I am wearied of the day,
I will let the friendly, starry night
greet all my ardent desires
like a sleepy child.

Hands, stop all your work.
Brow, forget all your thinking.
All my senses now
yearn to sink into slumber.

And my unfettered soul
wishes to soar up freely
into night's magic sphere
to live there deeply and thousandfold.

It was exactly what I needed. I began to weep.

I must have listened to it seven time before I arrived at Danny's house. I felt in a decent mood, however I had been running on nervous energy for a few hours and soon hit the wall. He persuaded me to go to bed early, and I slept more soundly than I have in weeks.


Date: 2010-07-02 02:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ghostsandrobots.livejournal.com
Good to see you back and hope things are more peaceful.

Date: 2010-07-02 03:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vaneramos.livejournal.com
I realized last night I've been repressing my instinct to express myself through writing, and how much stress that has caused. It's a relief to take the lid off that and move forward. And so good to hear from you.

Date: 2010-07-02 03:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ghostsandrobots.livejournal.com
I understand how that feels and it SUCKS. You've been missed.

Date: 2010-07-02 05:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] abendstille.livejournal.com
yes they are beautiful and i love Renee Fleming! i´m glad they touched you

Date: 2010-07-02 05:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vaneramos.livejournal.com
It was one of those musical experiences I will never forget.

Date: 2010-07-02 11:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vaneramos.livejournal.com
P.S. I've been enchanted with Renée Fleming since seeing her in Eugene Onegin from the Met on big screen a couple years ago. I think I bought this disk at a subsequent opera broadcast, but have never got around to seriously listening to it until now.

Date: 2010-07-03 06:06 pm (UTC)
bigmacbear: Me in a leather jacket and Hockey Night in Canada ball cap, on a ferry with Puget Sound in background (Default)
From: [personal profile] bigmacbear
I've been enchanted with Renée Fleming since seeing her in Eugene Onegin

I think it's funny that at first glance I thought you saw Renée in Eugene, Oregon, and wondered what brought you all this way west for an opera performance. ;-)

Not that [livejournal.com profile] gmjambear and I would mind you and Danny coming west, though...

Date: 2010-07-03 08:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vaneramos.livejournal.com
I would love to. Danny wants to travel that way during one of Bill and Daniel's frequent visits to Seattle. Whether I can accompany him will depend on how my employment and finances. I loved the west coast of Canada but have never travelled west of the Mississippi.

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