vaneramos | Dream: beach ball AIDS memorial

I was visiting my family, but "my kids" seemed to be a boy and a girl, perhaps Dan's kids; and my brother and sister-in-law seemed to be Jane (sister) and David (brother-in-law) K., who were not visible in the dream, but apparently lived in what resembled a retirement bungalow complex. The people who lived there were mostly in their 40s or 50s. The complex was situated on the location of my childhood home at Poplar Bluff (the only real connection to my family), though the lakeside lawn was much deeper, and the condos sprawled across where the road should have been, taking up part of the golf course. It felt like Dad and Betty were around, but they also never appeared.

I kept playing a game with my kids and another adult, possibly Jane or David. This involved a huge transparent beach ball which we were supposed to keep off the ground. At the same time we seemed to be trying to serve it to hit a space in the air (indicated by a greyish spot) in the direction of the bluff. Then someone had to run and try to hit it before it hit the ground. The sounds the boy would make when he missed the ball gave the impression of Dan's son, Eric.

We kept trying to move the game toward the beach. We never really made it there, however once somebody hit the ball too close to the bluff. A whole crowd of people went running to stop it. I reached the edge first with the two kids. When others arrived behind us, the edge collapsed and the three of us slid down with a minor avalanche of soft, sandy soil. It felt like a futon. This effectively carried us to the beach, however we immediately found our way back to the top and started playing again. It must have been Jane who had joined our game. I could hear David's voice giving her instructions about how best to serve the ball, but couldn't see him.

Some kind of family reunion was going on, like one of Mom's family's big summer parties that used to happen at our place, however there were no other children present and I didn't see anyone I recognized. I kept trying to leave to do something else, but the beach ball would come and hit me in the head (it started to become deflated and felt like a pillow). Then the game would resume (when I first woke up, all I could remember was endlessly volleying this thing).

The party turned out to be an AIDS memorial ceremony. People would bring original artworks (usually sculptures) to place in a central garden commemorating loved ones. Many of the people who lived in the complex were widows whose husbands had died. I saw one woman slip discreetly from her door and place a small, brass item on the front wall of her condo. The delicately-cut piece spelt someobody's name. The buildings were covered with things like this. There were so many, people could place them and no one would know who had done it. So while many of the people who lived here had been affected by AIDS, it was also kind of a secret.