My therapist, on spending

[vaneramos]

I said, "Money burns a hole in my pocket."

My therapist said, "You are being too hard on yourself." I keep painting myself according to an old image of the way I used to be. I am not that same person anymore, she pointed out. I have become far more conscientious about my spending habits. When I go over budget, I'm not being extravagant. These are small infractions. It is normal behaviour for people to want to treat themselve in small ways. I need to allow for that, she said.

Nevertheless, the budget is important. There are different ways of doing things, she reminded me. I need to concentrate on finding less expensive methods, rather than berating myself over small mishaps.

She talked for quite a few minutes, actually. She has never given such a long lecture before. I enjoyed it.

Whenever I spend money, I feel under a cloud, worrying, afraid of myself, afraid of ruining my life. People tend to do this: focus on their screw-ups, rather than figure out how to make things better. It's like religion.