Wrestling with my futon

[vaneramos]

At home I rarely sleep past 6:30. It doesn't matter how late I stay up the night before. If I went to bed at 2 a.m., I'll sleep four or five hours (a frequent occurrence). I try to snooze some more, but my computer starts calling. Soon I drift out of bed and into the office.

Now that I have set a routine and followed it successfully for a single day, the emotional dynamics of my futon has suddenly changed. Yesterday wore me out. I went to bed at a respectable 12:45.

This morning I slept in until 7:30. Then, lying there comfortably in bed, I didn't want to get out of it.

Funny how that is. I don't want to face the slave driver, Me.

Well, it's Saturday. I seduced myself out of bed with the idea that I can take extra time for my walk this morning, visit the farmer's market and take lots of people pictures. That will be fun. Then home to write, and an easy afternoon browsing for ecological news and brainstorming story ideas.

And tomorrow is my day off, so I can stay in bed if I want to. Or never get dressed and sit naked at my computer all day.

Just maybe, I'll make myself extra happy by getting out my coloured pencils.



My kitchen window at 8 a.m.

Comments

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Help. There's a lot at stake, primarily doing what I want by selling my creations instead of renting hunks of my life and soul out to other people. Sometimes I think I have the self-discipline. I was not taught to value this way of life, or to appreciate these qualities in myself. I have to learn it. Feeling connected seems to be a vital cornerstone which was missing for most of my life, but which I have started to carve out.