Christmas 2003

[vaneramos]

Here I am on Christmas morning doing the same thing as lfkbear. I'm not alone, but Brenna is busy making little critters out of a bundle of new pipe cleaners, and Marian is already well into The Sword of Shannara, so I'm sitting at my computer. My worst fear was that Christmas would be just like every other day, but now that the reality has arrived, it isn't a bad thing.

I was lonelier as a teenager than I am now. Christmastime would usually bring home my older brothers with their wives, relieving the stress and boredom of being alone with my parents. I expected Christmas to be happier than other times, and usually it was.

Unfortunately I don't have any contact with my brothers now, but that isn't the point. What matters is that I'm generally happier now than I have been for most of my life. I have had some depression the past couple of months, but the big picture looks okay.

My daughters are good company and so is myself most of the time. It would be nice to have friends drop by for hors d'ouevres, but maybe that will happen tomorrow or the next day. It would be nice to sit and have a quiet coffee on the couch with djjo, but I remember how happy he was about seeing his parents and sister for the first time in 18 months, so I can wait four days. I am content.

It's time I went for a comfortable, hot shower.

Comments

[lfkbear.livejournal.com]

Isn't it interesting how sometimes the anticipation of a potentially tough day is worse than the reality? I'm glad that you're able to find a sense of peace and comfort today. We're both yearning for more than we have in front of us, but it's nice that we can embrace and enjoy what we've been given, too. I'm a firm believer that people with patience will get what they truly deserve and want with time.

Have a good day. I hope the days leading to the reunion with your special guy will go by very quickly.

HUGS

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Larry. On one had I don't want to wish away these next several days with my daughters, but I look forward to seeing him. Your worst are encouraging, and I hope the rest of the day was relaxing and pleasant for you as it was for me.

Hugs,
Van

Gentle Man

[martinsoba.livejournal.com]

I've been reading your journal for a few days now. You seem so gentle and kind. You also have a passion for food that I admire and share. I hope we get to see a picture of tonight's dinner! I'm just starting out with LJ and I hope you don't mind if I add you to my friends.

Re: Gentle Man

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

I am essentially gentle. Welcome to LJ and my journal.

I have much more fun with food when I have someone else to cook for, in this case my daughters. Unfortunately tonight's dinner wasn't as photogenic, so I won't be posting pics.

But the menu included: turkey with mushroom and tarragon stuffing, hash browns (my younger daughter prefers potatoes that way), broccoli, lettuce salad with pear, grated carrot and ginger dressing, and a special apple crisp.

Re: Gentle Man

[martinsoba.livejournal.com]

Sounds yummy. I wish I had someone to cook for, someone to cook with, and someone to cook for me...
Ever since I started culinary school, people have become intimidated to cook for me. Except my sister, she thinks she can't cook. She always asks me all kinds of questions. But then she always answers her own questions. She's really very good in the kitchen. She made an incredible xmas eve dinner. I enjoyed standing in the kitchen, talking, and watching.
I don't think food needs to be perfect or gourmet, it just needs to be made with love.

[quirkstreet.livejournal.com]

Happy Christmas, honey!

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

And a snuggly Christmas night kiss to you.

[currawong.livejournal.com]

Thinking warmly of you Van and wishing you a happy Christmas and a peaceful, loving New Year.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Thank you, Bill. We have had a pleasant and happy day. And I am looking forward to some cuddle days over New Years. Have a wonderful holiday season.

[bluebellrock.livejournal.com]

Your easy acceptance of the lovely little (not minor) pleasantries of your home environment sounds for all the world to me as if you're starting to emerge from the cocoon of depression. Slowly and gently. I barely know you, but I find myself genuinely happy for you. I wouldn't wish depression of that magnitude on my worst enemy. Congratulations for getting back on a more temperate track.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

The past two years have been much better. A few setbacks in the past few weeks have taken me by surprise and I hope this trend won't continue for the winter, but at the moment I'm feeling fine. Going a day at a time is the only thing to do. Thanks for your kind words.