Pause button

[vaneramos]

Wow, I've missed three of the past four days making my regular 200-word post. I could do it this evening but don't want to just for the sake of saying I did.

I had a not-very-good reason Saturday, no reason yesterday or today. I must consider carefully, asking myself, "Am I depressed?" The answer is no. I'm not sick or tired of it, either.

I have recently wanted and started to refocus creative energy. The chapbook is evidence, and other endeavours stand in waiting. At times I feel I'm fitting LJ into stolen time. I've reached a point of change.

This journal is too important creatively, and the community socially, for me to abandon it.

But I've spent the past several hours catching up with people I feel close to. Right now I just want to eat, then work on something else before bed. I was intending to just let myself follow that feeling, but seeing I've nearly reached 200 words anyway, I might as well go with that instead. I rarely manage to be succinct about personal revelation, which is part of the purpose for the word quota.

I'll worry another day about what to do with all this.

Comments

[e-musings.livejournal.com]

I think being with people in RL is a fine way to spend time!

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

This isn't just about spending time with people, it also involves feeling more empowered, connected and productive in my solitude. I'm considering my introversion less as an obstacle, and more as an approach to living and interacting with the world. Or something like that. LJ cannot substitute for spending time with people RL, but it is important to me.

[missprune.livejournal.com]

Maybe it's just time to change the system you're using. I find I don't want to have rules and norms about livejournal. But then I've never been able to make myself do morning pages either!

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

I've regarded the 200-word thing more as a tool than a rule. The process of writing something then having to edit it down to 200 words has been great practice in seeing what is important and what's extraneous. Writing daily breaks through my resistance. Maybe this is just another level of resistance, or maybe there's a good reason and it's time to change my approach.

[missprune.livejournal.com]

Seems like this is a question you and I have pondered before -- when does the resistance (or the boredom) mean it's time for a change, and when does it mean, keep it up, press on, you're going to break through right here.

[tim-e-bear.livejournal.com]

It's like me and my 'zine. I enjoy doing it, but there are times I just have a hard time going to the well, when other things compete.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Yes, going to the well. I do try to write every day, and what a challenge it is!