Who to thank?

[vaneramos]

One of the awkward things about being an atheist is not knowing who to thank. This afternoon I felt full of praise and gratitude. I might say, "Praise the universe." But the universe doesn't hear, care or even think.

My walk didn't start out so well. I considered buying new batteries for the camera, decided not to, and left the apartment. Arriving in the woods without it 15 minutes later, I immediately regretted my decision.

At other times I might have decided to forget it, but not today. These few weeks between April 15 and May 15 are my favourite time of year. This is when ephemeral woodland flowers bloom, migrating birds return and the trees leaf out.

Today for the first time I saw the Eastern phoebe perched in a tree on the riverside field where he and his mate nest every spring.

In the woods across the river I found a radiant clump of bloodroot. In the drab spring woods, there is no sight more joyful. The flowers pass quickly. Some years I miss them altogether.

This time I was determined to capture the image. Who knows whether it will rain tomorrow, or when I'll have a chance to walk there again. I had no choice but to go home, get my camera, and buy some batteries across the street. The corner variety store had "Extra Heavy Duty" Panasonic AA batteries, $2.69 for a pack of four. I had no choice.

By now I should know better than to waste money on cheap batteries for the camera.

One of the good things about being an atheist is I have no one to curse, no one else to blame for my stupid mistakes. I must take ultimate responsibility for my own life. Sometimes having a sense of responsiblity facilitates making better decisions the next time.

But not today. Those useless batteries had enough juice for all of 15 images. But at least I managed to return to the woods across the river and take pictures of the bloodroot.






I searched further for wild ginger. It took a while, but finally I noticed some shoots barely emerging from the matted leaves. The shy, purple flowers won't be open for a few more days.

Then something stopped me in my tracks. Two mallards were huddled near the trail, a long waddle from the riverbank. They were languid, almost stupefied, and hesitated to move away. They must have been mating when I happened along, or maybe luxuriating in the afterglow. Otherwise I would not have seen them together. The drake departs once this business is done and leaves the female to raise the young by herself.






I learned something new about mallards on the nature walk with Sylvie the other day. The female duck will look for a pair of Canada geese and nest near them if possible, often on the other side of a small island. Unlike mallards, male geese don't abandon their mates. The pair shares responsiblity for incubating the eggs, raising the young and guarding the nest. As a couple they have more time and energy to defend the site from predators, so the single female mallard benefits from nesting in their vicinity.

Just a few minutes earlier I had seen a Canada goose sitting on a nest on an island in the river. I suppose the female mallard busy in the woods has already figured everything out.

Walking home down a quiet alley, I was glad about the warm sunshine. I was glad for bloodroot, glad that I had not gone looking too late, and glad that I had taken a photo. I was glad that abandonned mallard mothers are so resourceful.

Most of all I was glad to be on my feet in the April sunshine. Five weeks ago before my surgery, I expected to spend these weeks in pain, barely limping to the end of the street if I was lucky, missing an entire spring of woodland wonder. Things turned out differently. My body is surprisingly strong and resilient, and I'm glad, glad, glad.

But I don't know who to thank.

Comments

[ruralrob.livejournal.com]

You beat me to the punch on the bloodroot. Its one of my favourite flowers - at least its timeliness - and we have some nice clumps of it on our property. But no wild ginger.

Anyway, glad to hear you are so up and about and enjoying the sights - and being glad.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

It's interesting how spring moves eastward in Ontario. At my mother's place, the bloodroot bloomed on Easter weekend.

[missprune.livejournal.com]

I like the way C-Threepio fervently exclaims, "Thank the Maker!" And if it turns out the Maker is You- your own mind brilliantly organizing the photons and so on -- it still works.
Beautiful photo of the bloodroot flowers! I am not familiar with them.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Well then, thank the Maker!

[stealthpup.livejournal.com]

Or your parents. Or the flowers and ducks. Or whatever.

I'm not a pure atheist, since, for all I know, there just might be some omniscient omnipotent beastie that created the universe. Exactly what Its responsibilities or concerns might be are beyond me, though, so I choose not to worry about it overmuch and act pretty much like your standard everyday atheist. But, for fun, I pour libations to the Gods of Probability; they've got some whacked-out sense of humor.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Might as well; pouring libations is good for the spirits.

Sounds like you are an agnostic, which is perfectly respectable.

[art-thirst.livejournal.com]

I'm curious... what kind of choir is that, a non-religious organization? I was confused by you saying you're atheist and singing in a Christian church choir (if it is that).

Thank you VERY much for the flowers and ducks. Those simple, but hidden to most urban dwellers, spring activities give me chills of excitement. I have a botanist friend that gave me some ginger. I'll have to ask him which variety it is tomorrow and if you want to know I can let you know and maybe show you a pic on the botanical garden's website (if they have any there). http://www.fairchildgarden.org

(I want a digital camera so badly... *sigh*)

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

The choir is for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered people and their friends. To make the choir as inclusive as possible within that community, we mostly avoid religious repertoire.

This wild ginger, Asarum canadense, is native to North America. It is not related to the more familiar ginger, which is a tropical plant. The roots are edible, however, and have a nice ginger flavour. It is also an attractive plant to include in a spring garden. I'll try to get some photos when the flowers open.

[art-thirst.livejournal.com]

I talked to my botanist friend today. He said the same thing as you about the ginger. He gave me a ginger (hedychium) that is a true ginger although I don't think it will flower. It's growing very nicely though. :-)
The other question you asked via email about mysticism isn't easily found in books because of the singing and dancing that seem to captivate the attention but meditation is part of African religions. I'll hunt you up a book list that might be of help from my own collection.

[emjaybaxter.livejournal.com]

We're on the same wavelength today. And like you this is my favourite time of year as well. On my walk yesterday I was looking for Bloodroot. I could see it just coming into flower but couldn't get close due to undergrowth. I'll have to try again. As for wild ginger it's a great plant, beautiful glossy green leaves, perfect for this time of year. We had it in our garden in TO.

Glad to hear you're up to walking around and checking out the spring sites. As for thanking someone, well like you I'm not religious either, although I would say I'm spiritual but not in a supreme being way. I always say a general thanks to the plants and birds and whatever, just for being there for me to see, as well as me being alive to see it all.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Yes, nature itself is wondrous and magnificent, great inspiration for a spiritual life. I'm happy to be a small part of it all.

[ranger1.livejournal.com]

Even better days are ahead.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Interesting that you would say that. I'm sure they are.

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

Doing so would probably be a good lesson, too, in stopping to communicate with things I encounter, living or otherwise. I am reminded of the obsidian hand tool you photographed. What stories it must have to tell!

[peregrinus236.livejournal.com]

Athiests have to work so hard, especially at this time of year, to maintian whatever it is they're trying to maintain. However you try to explain things, at the core it's a mystery. And it always seems to become a problem when one tries to explain an mystery -- which is how we got into the tangle of theology in the first place. (Personally, I think theologians suffer from lack of oxygen in the rarified atmosphere they inhabit.) But mostly I think it's unnecessary to decide who to thank -- just rejoice and be glad in it. And you seem to do that quite nicely -- let there be lights, cameras, action!

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

If I seem to be working hard, it's because the atheist perspective is new to me. Arriving here was more arduous.

I once had different beliefs, but they stopped making sense. In the wake of 9-11 I realized I had drifted into not believing in God. It disturbed me, because I wanted a spiritual life.

I had to consider whether atheism actually made sense. I had to find a new basis for meditation and working out my values. I have resolved those questions to my own satisfaction.

But once in a while I find myself in familiar territory following old habits and needing to rethink things.